Smoking Ruins of the Sellout Shack

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Once upon a time, there was an emporium where shiny gold money could be exchanged for rats and other oddities. That time has passed.

Always

Always

Forage in the ruins

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are strongly against you here.

Maybe there's still something left in all this rubble.


Life in Jail Zone

Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1

Rat Penance

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly...

Always

Always


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Rataholics Anonymous

Need to discuss your rat issues, or maybe just find some hapless victim to dump rats onto?

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 304638

Rat Prizes Lounge!

Unlocked with Rat Points 1 - you have 10707

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest...

The Crime Shack

Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 4

Only visible if you are at least slightly tainted with Crime, the Crime Shack is the place where the Crime Squads hang out, sit back, drink a Brew and regret it intensely...

Rat Tournament!

Unlocked with Tournament Standing 1 - you have 1

The Objective Outhouse

In a mysterious shack, in a mysterious place, a mysterious individual answers mysterious...

Smoking Ruins of the Sellout Shack

Unlocked with 10,000 x Rat  - you have 304638; Unlocked with Rat Points 10,000 - you have 10707

Once upon a time, there was an emporium where shiny gold money could be exchanged for rats and other oddities...

Always

Always

Rat Fight

A scavenger bets you that his rat collection is better than yours...

Rat Egg

A rather common formation in the Rat Zone...


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 772671)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 772671

Send One Hundred Rats

You've received quite a reasonable sum of rats from [Actor], but not a king's bounty. Far from a Rat King's bounty.

[Participants] has received a Rat Gift from you. Your Rat Points score benefits accordingly.


Rat Gambling

Roll up, roll up! Bet a rat, maybe win a rat! The odds are... whatever the odds are today. Maybe you'll win the jackpot! Legend says it's enough to become a King, right there on the spot.

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Gamble

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: it could go either way.

Put one thousand rats in the Magic Wheel of Rat Fortune. If you win, you receive ten thousand rats. If you fail, you lose your rats. Maybe you'll hit the jackpot!

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 304638)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 304638

Gamble: High stakes!

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

Put ten thousand rats in the Advanced Wheel of Rat Destiny. If you win, you'll receive two hundred thousand rats. If you fail, you lose your stake.

            10000
            Unlocked with 10,000 x Rat  - you have 304638

Don't Gamble

You don't feel like gambling, or you're afraid of losing all your rats in a gambling binge. It's ok. You don't have to gamble.

Double or Nothing!

A simple game, but one that's made many a scavenger lose their haul. Flip a coin: Heads, you get double your rats. Tails, you lose everything. Are you up for it?

            5000
            You need 5,000 x Rat  (you have 304638)

            5000
            Unlocked with 5,000 x Rat  - you have 304638

Gamble it all!

Double or Nothing? Sure! Time to bet every rat you own!


Always

Always


Loser!!

Gamble: High stakes!

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

            10000
            Unlocked with 10,000 x Rat  - you have 294638

Uh oh! Guess luck wasn't on your side when you needed it most. You lose your stake, and the Rats spiral into the machine, never again to be glimpsed by human eyes.

You were unlucky. Better luck next time...

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

You've lost 10,000 x Rat (new total 294,638).

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Your Gambling Losses have changed!


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats 1 - Intrigued

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats: Intrigued

Crippling Debt

Crippling Debt 538,374 - Should probably learn when to quit

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Should probably learn when to quit:538374

Crippling Debt: Should probably learn when to quit

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 772671)

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 772671

            1
            Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1

Send One Thousand Rats

[Actor] has sent you one thousand rats. Don't question where you're going to keep them. The Rat Zone will handle the storage. All shall be rat, and all manner of thing shall be rat. So it is said.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

            6
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 6 and Reading the Rat Codes no more than 6 (you have 6)

            6
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 6 - you have 6

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.

            1
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 1 (you have 6)

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

            1
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 1 - you have 6

            1
            Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 294638

Smoking Ruins of the Sellout Shack

Unlocked with 10,000 x Rat  - you have 294638; Unlocked with Rat Points 10,000 - you have 10707

Always

Always


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.


Rat Egg

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

A rather common formation in the Rat Zone. It is an egg filled with rats.

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Smash it!

There's generally a good amount of rats in there, and you could always use more rats. Everyone likes a nice bit of rat.

wait

hang on that doesn't make any sense

Take off an egg shaving

Maybe you can use it in your cooking.

            1
            You need 1 x Chef Hat  (you have 0)

            1
            Unlocked with 1 x Chef Hat


Always

Always


what

wait

hang on that doesn't make any sense

what's an egg full of rats why is what is this rat zone place help help hhelp

Shush, it'll be OK. Such is life in the Rat Zone. Have a Rat Point.

You've gained 1 x Rat Points (new total 10,708).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Rat Prizes Lounge!

Unlocked with Rat Points 1 - you have 10708

Smoking Ruins of the Sellout Shack

Unlocked with 10,000 x Rat  - you have 294638; Unlocked with Rat Points 10,000 - you have 10708

Always

Always


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.


Rataholics Anonymous

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Need to discuss your rat issues, or maybe just find some hapless victim to dump rats onto? This is the place for that, as laid out in the Rat Codes of Practise. Please note that the name has nothing to do with Ratahol. We're not even sure Ratahol exists, and if it does it's probably illegal.

Always

Always

Locate rathavers in your area

Rathavers willing to both send and receive rats are waiting at your call.

Send a Message

Rats are the medium of communication du jour in the Rat Zone, but if you're a bit snobbish, you can send a letter the old fashioned way.
NOTE: if you don't put anything in the message box, no message will actually be sent.

Die

If you want to, I won't stop you.

Go to the Emblem Emporium

A fancy place!

You may change your avatar here

Go to Boutiqué de Rat

The nexus of high Rat Fashion!

            5000
            You need Rat Points 5,000 (you have 10708)

            5000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 5,000 - you have 10708

Go to the Rat Achievement Station

Where the brave and the bold can have their deeds accredited.

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 294638)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 294638

The Objective Outhouse

Ask the Mystery Mystic a question, and you shall learn. The Mystic specialises mostly in Rat Zone activities. They're basically a ratty travel agent.

Rat Challenge!

Want to prove your rats are more magnificent and incredible than another person's rats? Prove it, with a rat challenge! The odds are extremely fair. If you have the better rats. If you don't, it's probably highly unfair. Such is life etc etc.

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 294638)

            10
            You need Rat Points 10 (you have 10708)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 294638

            10
            Unlocked with Rat Points 10 - you have 10708

Rat Challenge

[Actor] has challenged you to a contest of Rats! Whoever has the more lustrous and refined rat collection will win some rats and Rat Points! The loser will lose some!

Congratulations! Your rat collection was more magnificent and attractive than [Participants]'s collection. You win a Prize!

Minor Fancy-Off

Challenge someone else to a Fancy Off! Win or lose 100 Rat Points!

            1
            You need Fanciness 1

            100
            You need Rat Points 100 (you have 10708)

            1
            Unlocked with Fanciness 1

            100
            Unlocked with Rat Points 100 - you have 10708

Minor Fancy

[Actor] has challenged you to a Minor Fanciness Duel!

Congratulations! You are much fancier than [Participants].

Major Fancy-Off

Challenge someone else to a Fanciness Contest! Stake 1000 Rat Points on your relative fanciness!

            1
            You need Fanciness 1

            1000
            You need Rat Points 1,000 (you have 10708)

            1
            Unlocked with Fanciness 1

            1000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 1,000 - you have 10708

Major Fancy

[Actor] has challenged you to a Major Fanciness Duel!

Congratulations! You are more magnificent and fancy than [Participants]

Cook some things!

Don a Chef Hat and deal in the dark matter of Horrendous Brews.

            1
            You need Chef Powers 1

            1
            Unlocked with Chef Powers 1


Always

Always


R I P

Die

Well, ok then. If you say so.

If you want to, I won't stop you.

Are you really sure you want to do this?


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.


Always

Always


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Always

Always

Rat Grant Applications!

Send in an application to Ratco, where it will be processed swiftly and you will be granted with rats...


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.


Rat Prizes Lounge!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

Always

Always

One Hundred Rats

Seventy five Rat Points will buy you 100 rats. Alright exchange rat(e).

            75
            You need Rat Points 75 (you have 10708)

            75
            Unlocked with Rat Points 75 - you have 10708

One Thousand Rats

500 Rat Points will buy you 1000 Rats. Better exchange rate!

            500
            You need Rat Points 500 (you have 10708)

            500
            Unlocked with Rat Points 500 - you have 10708

Five thousand rats

2000 Rat Points will buy you 5000 Rats. Even better exchange rate!

            2000
            You need Rat Points 2,000 (you have 10708)

            2000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 2,000 - you have 10708

Twenty thousand rats!

6000 Rat Points will get you 20000 Rats. Best exchange rate? Not quite.

            6000
            You need Rat Points 6,000 (you have 10708)

            6000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 6,000 - you have 10708

Ticket to Well

No luck finding wells in the Rat Acquisition Deck? Ratco does not encourage well liason, but if you're willing to spend the Rat Points you can get yourself a guaranteed meeting with a well.

            7777
            You need Rat Points 7,777 (you have 10708)

            7777
            Unlocked with Rat Points 7,777 - you have 10708

Buy a Brew

Need a Horrendous Brew? For some horrendous disgusting reason? The vending machine offers a "delicious nutrient solution", but it's not very nutritious or delicious and is actually rather horrendous.

However, because head management at Ratco believe the solution to be the most delicious thing ever made, the price is quite high. Still, if you can't find any other means of obtaining a brew, this one works.

            15000
            You need 15,000 x Rat  (you have 294638)

            5000
            You need Rat Points 5,000 (you have 10708)

            15000
            Unlocked with 15,000 x Rat  - you have 294638

            5000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 5,000 - you have 10708

One Hundred Thousand Rats

A whopping 32000 rat points will net you this princely (But not Rat-Kingly) sum of 100000 rats. Best exchange rate? Yes, definitely.

            32000
            You need Rat Points 32,000 (you have 10708)

            32000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 32,000 - you have 10708


Always

Always


Regret

Rat Prizes Lounge!

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.
<p>[This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not]</p>

Buy a Brew

            15000
            You need 15,000 x Rat  (you have 279638)

            5000
            You need Rat Points 5,000 (you have 5708)

            15000
            Unlocked with 15,000 x Rat  - you have 279638

            5000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 5,000 - you have 5708

The machine dispenses a paper cup onto the counter, and fills it with an evil-smelling black stew. The smell of it makes you retch, and you grab it and exit quickly before anything disgusting happens. Hopefully you can find some use for this before you pass out from its noxious fumes.

You've gained 1 x Horrendous Brew (new total 20).

You've lost 15,000 x Rat (new total 279,638).

You've lost 5,000 x Rat Points (new total 5,708).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 772671)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 772671


Always

Always


Prizes!!!

Rat Prizes Lounge!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.
<p>[This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not]</p>

Five thousand rats

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

2000 Rat Points will buy you 5000 Rats. Even better exchange rate!

            2000
            You need Rat Points 2,000 (you have 3708)

            2000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 2,000 - you have 3708

The machine clicks, and then explodes into a flurry of rats. Fortunately, a replacement vending machine takes its place, so you can still trade here. And you have your rats, slightly charred due to vending machine related combustion though they may be.

You've gained 5,000 x Rat (new total 284,638).

You've lost 2,000 x Rat Points (new total 3,708).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 772671)

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 772671

            1
            Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

            6
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 6 and Reading the Rat Codes no more than 6 (you have 6)

            6
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 6 - you have 6

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.

            1
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 1 (you have 6)

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

            1
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 1 - you have 6

            1
            Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1


Always

Always


Prizes!!!

Rat Prizes Lounge!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.
<p>[This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not]</p>

Five thousand rats

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

2000 Rat Points will buy you 5000 Rats. Even better exchange rate!

            2000
            You need Rat Points 2,000 (you have 1708)

            2000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 2,000 - you have 1708

The machine clicks, and then explodes into a flurry of rats. Fortunately, a replacement vending machine takes its place, so you can still trade here. And you have your rats, slightly charred due to vending machine related combustion though they may be.

You've gained 5,000 x Rat (new total 289,638).

You've lost 2,000 x Rat Points (new total 1,708).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.


Always

Always


Prizes!

Rat Prizes Lounge!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.
<p>[This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not]</p>

One Hundred Rats

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

Seventy five Rat Points will buy you 100 rats. Alright exchange rat(e).

            75
            You need Rat Points 75 (you have 1633)

            75
            Unlocked with Rat Points 75 - you have 1633

The machine spits out a neat stack of one hundred rats onto the counter. Gross.

You've gained 100 x Rat (new total 289,738).

You've lost 75 x Rat Points (new total 1,633).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.


Always

Always


Prizes!!

Rat Prizes Lounge!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.
<p>[This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not]</p>

One Thousand Rats

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

500 Rat Points will buy you 1000 Rats. Better exchange rate!

            500
            You need Rat Points 500 (you have 1133)

            500
            Unlocked with Rat Points 500 - you have 1133

The vending machine whirrs, and shoots out a clod of rats directly at you. Fortunately, the physics of Rat Zone teleport the rats directly into the metaphysical plane where rats are stored. Thanks, physics!

You've gained 1,000 x Rat (new total 290,738).

You've lost 500 x Rat Points (new total 1,133).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.


Always

Always


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 290738

Rat Prizes Lounge!

Unlocked with Rat Points 1 - you have 1133

Always

Always


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.


Rat Fight

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

A scavenger bets you that his rat collection is better than yours.

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

You'll show him!

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

A straightforward challenge

Your collection is the best collection of all! This chump's got nothing on you! A spontaneous fight out in the open like this might raise a few eyebrows, though

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 290738)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 290738

Don't rise to it.

Your rat collection is better than his. You know it. You don't need validation from some second-class smuggler to know it. March on proudly, chin held high in the air.


Always

Always


Success!

You'll show him!

A straightforward challenge

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 304640

Your rat collection was indeed, better than his. He hands over his rats in shameful disgrace, and some rat points as well. Huzzah!

You succeeded in a Rat challenge!

You've gained 13,902 x Rat (new total 304,640).

You've gained 1,442 x Rat Points (new total 2,575).

1 change point, 4 more needed to reach level 5.

Crime Level is increasing...


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 304640

Rat Prizes Lounge!

Unlocked with Rat Points 1 - you have 2575

Always

Always


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.


Rat Tournament!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Aaaaare you ready to ratble? I sure hope so! I don't know how a ratble is achieved but there's one happening right now.

Winning will move you up a branch in the tournament. You will get a tenth of the loser's rats. Losing moves you back a branch, and will cost you some rats. Most actions may loop back, requiring a Perhaps Not to leave so you can do other things.

Always

Always

First Challenger!

A straightforward challenge

The first bracket of the tournament has you facing off against Karen the Ratter. Not much to say except good luck!

Refreshments!

There are several refreshments stalls just at the fringe of the action. Maybe you can get something for free, being a competitor and all.

You have this Golden Rat, other people don't have Golden Rats. Better make the most of it and gloat about it!

            1
            You need 1 x Golden Rat  (you have 0)

            1
            Unlocked with 1 x Golden Rat

Gloat

[Actor] has a Golden Rat and you don't! And they're gloating about it! What a jerk.

You gloated about your possession of the Golden Rat to [Participants]. Hope it makes you feel better.

The Gambling Tent

A shady tent some way out from the refreshment stalls is the #1 location for betting and gambling at this event.


Always

Always


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Always

Always


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.


Sending Rats!

Well, here we are. The nub and/or crux of this Video Game, is, of course, to send rats. And that is what this is for. To send rats. Sending rats will gain you Rat Points, which can be used to buy Prizes from the Rat Prizes Lounge, which will show up whenever you actually have a Rat Point.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

Always

Always

Ten Rats

You are going to send rats to another person. Do not question the hows and whys, the Rat Zone will handle all the postage and delivery stuff. Give 10 rodent corpses to another Rat Zone dweller.

            10
            You need 10 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            10
            Unlocked with 10 x Rat  - you have 304640

Send Ten Rats

Ten rats. That's as many as ten ones. And that's... a barely sufficient gift for the peasants of the Rat Zone. You should be mildly grateful to [Actor].

One Hundred Rats

Your entire starting budget's worth of rats! Maybe it is your entire starting budget, if you're impatient and really want to give someone all of your rats. It's OK. I won't judge.

One Thousand Rats

Now this, this is a lot of rats. Perhaps enough to provide restitution for any of your past crimes. They do say that in the end, all sins are forgiven. Maybe not if you killed all of these rats yourself though, that'd probably get you a reputation as a war criminal among rats.

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 304640

Ten Thousand Rats

Sending Rats!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

You could probably kill someone with this many rats. But you're not going to, because this is the Rat Zone, a peaceful land of co-operation and rats. Mostly the latter. This many rats will get you a small surplus benefit of Rat Points. Not many, but they're there.

            10000
            Unlocked with 10,000 x Rat  - you have 304640

Send Ten Thousand Rats

Dear god, where did [Actor] get this many rats? Well, whereever they came from, they're yours now. Enjoy?

[Participants] has received a substantial Rat Gift from you. Your Rat Points score benefits greatly.

Fifty Thousand Rats

Now this is a king's bounty! But not a Rat King's bounty, because 50000 rats isn't enough to be a Rat King. How many is enough? More than you have. Again, a small surplus bonus. It could be bigger, but it'll save you sending a few rats.

            50000
            Unlocked with 50,000 x Rat  - you have 304640

Send Fifty Thousand Rats

Oh come on. I mean, seriously, come on. Fifty thousand rats? What could [Actor] be thinking? Either way, you now have an Everest of your very own. Made up of furry corpses.

SEVEN

A well told you about the secret Tally of Rats, hidden away and forgotten about. It informed you that you could learn of this Tally, but a great sacrifice must be made. Namely, the sacrifice of seven hundred and seventy seven thousand, seven hundred and seventy seven rats. These rats must be sent to a "friend" at a time when any rational sane human being would be asleep. You believed the well, because you generally believe in stonework. Good honest stonework. It's a hole in the ground, how could it be wrong?

            777777
            You need 777,777 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            1
            You need Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats 1 (you have 1)

            777777
            Unlocked with 777,777 x Rat  - you have 304640

            1
            Unlocked with Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats 1 - you have 1

Seven Seven Seven Seven Seven Seven Seven

Lately, you've seen [Actor] staggering around and muttering something about the number seven. Apparently, they need to convince themselves that seven is indeed a number or something. Anyway, this morning at about 5AM you heard a mighty crash outside. When you checked outside, you found a barely-conscious [Actor] and a colossal stack of rats. 777777 rats, according to [Actor]. You didn't check.

[Participants] knows the glory of the Number, and you, the glory of the Candle.

One Hundred Thousand Rats

A literal mountain of rats. If it weren't for the strange Rat Storage Zone, this towering pillar would probably block out the sun, acting as a monolithic reminder as to the hubris of man. And you're going to give all these rats to another person, because you either really like or absolutely detest them.

            100000
            Unlocked with 100,000 x Rat  - you have 304640

Send One Hundred Thousand Rats

Wow! This is a lot of rats. [Actor] has sent you a lot of rats. Really, a lot.

[Participants] has taken delivery of your one hundred thousand rats. They could probably fill a swimming pool. With rats.

All your rats!

Send someone all of your rats! All of them! Every last one!

            1
            You need 1 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            1
            You need 1 x Key of Dreams  (you have 0)

            1
            Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 304640

            1
            Unlocked with 1 x Key of Dreams

Send All Rats

[Actor] has sent you every rat they own! Amazing!

[Participants] has accepted all of your rats. Now they have everything you had before you sent all your rats away.

Send someone three bees. Maybe they really like bees, or maybe this is some dastardly plot to sting them to death. Bees!

            3
            You need 3 x Rat Bee  (you have 4)

            3
            Unlocked with 3 x Rat Bee  - you have 4

Bees!

[Actor] has sent you bees!? Is this a gift or an assassination attempt?

[Participants] has received your bees. Bees!


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Always

Always


Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Send some rats outside to the Rat Zone to reduce your sentence slightly. There won't be any indication that they actually came from Jail Zone though.

Always

Always

Just one hundred

Rat Penance

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

That's all that's legal.

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 772671)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 772671


Rat Grant Applications!

Send in an application to Ratco, where it will be processed swiftly and you will be granted with rats. The longer you wait, the more rats you get. You can apply for several Grants at once, as long as they're different grants.
<p>Note: Grants applied for before 13/07/13 are invalid due to a clerical error causing them to wind up inside a grandfather clock. </p>

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

No Grant

You're not one for filling out forms and applications, or maybe you've already filled out <i>all</i> the forms and applications. I won't judge. The way out of the Grants Office is here.

Quick Grant

Rapid! You should have your rats within about 3 hours. Processing fees are a mere 10 rats.

Medium Grant

A bit slower! This'll take 6 hours. Processing fees of 150 rats.

            150
            You need 150 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            150
            Unlocked with 150 x Rat  - you have 304640

Long Grant

Plodding pace! After 12 hours, if you still care about this rat sending simulator, this grant will process. Filing fees cost 500 rats.

            500
            You need 500 x Rat  (you have 304640)

            500
            Unlocked with 500 x Rat  - you have 304640


Goodbye, office!

As you stroll out the door, you miraculously don't trip over a rat at the last minute. That makes a nice change from the norm. And hey, free rat!

You've gained 1 x Rat (new total 304,641).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Always

Always


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 304641

Always

Always


Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Always

Always

Wait.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Sit back, get comfortable and relax. Your crime level will diminish shortly.

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

Search for rats

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Elsewhere, rats in a jail cell would be a sign of uncleanliness. Here, it's a sign of generous jail-keepers.

Send a message back home.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Maybe you can beg a Rat King to spring you out of this place.

Slip some rats to another jail dweller

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: the odds are against you here.

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Why not? It helps pass the time. Just try to avoid getting caught doing it.

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 772671)

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 772671

            1
            Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Only a few pages left.

            6
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 6 and Reading the Rat Codes no more than 6 (you have 6)

            6
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 6 - you have 6

Re-read the Rat Codes

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Perhaps you lost track of the thread of lunacy somewhere. Or maybe you just want to start over.

            1
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 1 (you have 6)

            1
            You need Crime Level 1 (you have 1)

            1
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 1 - you have 6

            1
            Unlocked with Crime Level 1 - you have 1


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


The end comes on swift wings

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.
<p>[This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.]</p>

Not much now

Life in Jail Zone

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

Jail Zone is dull and boring. There are a variety of methods to diminish your Crime Level until you can leave here though.

This storylet will loop until you exit via Perhaps Not.

Only a few pages left.

            6
            You need Reading the Rat Codes 6 and Reading the Rat Codes no more than 6 (you have 7)

            6
            Unlocked with Reading the Rat Codes 6 - you have 7

is it rats. is it ever rats. how many storylines in fallen london can be summarised with "it's rats" i think it's at least 3 which isn't enough. are you worried you've driven at least one of your players to insanity. because i'm not, really. I can stop whenever I want! i think. it's just a matter of laudanum and fine wines, right??  rats rats rats rats rats rats rats. i can't feel my legs but that's ok i wasn't using them anyway. where we're going we don't need eyes. eyeless skulls still look like a butt, i am sorry, but this is my executive opinion. can i get an official position at failbetter games as "rat consultant" i think i've earjned it. my mind is full of rats. i am stepped so far in rats going on is as easy as go o'er. is that right i don't remember macbeth quotations any more. what, you rat! he rats him. everybody get rats, it's time to rat now. we got a real rat going down welcome to the neath rat. its your rat do your rat at the neath rat. alright. that was a reference to ancient relic movie "space jam" dear god it's been like an hour of straight typing about rats. do you think i should stop? i don't.

Fortunately, the stopping point is just ahead.

i never will. i will never stop. except to sleep i guess, i'm pretty sleepy and it's quarter past four in the morning. there's only so much rat one man can take. but in fairness, i don't know how much rat that is. it'd be a pretty high number, i think. at least a hundred thousand rats. i think this rat delivery should be pretty important, because it's the big 77777 after all, and 7 is the number. you said that, writer man. you are the person who wrote that and you can't unwrite it now. when's the fourth candle  happening anyway

remember, the word "jellyfish". it's important. BUT if you've read this far, i must make a caveat. the word is NOW "rattus rattus" and if you just send "jellyfish" i'm going to assume you haven't read the whole thing. however i also would like a mention from the second set of stipulations i mentioned earlier, this will prevent you from skipping straight to the end like a cheater. nobody cheats in the world of rats. there is only rat, wounds and nightmares, maganimous boosts and some abominable reputations. i can't drink rats. ok that's enough rats. i think that's enough rats. maybe it's not enough rats. should i send more rats. rats rats rats rats rats rats rats. rat rat rat rat rat rat rat. ra ra ra ra ra ra ra. r r r r r r r. 7

As you read the last word, a slip of paper is slid under the door. It says: "Congratulation on finishing the Rat Codes! Your reward is lots of rats and the end of your sentence." Well, that makes it all worthwhile, doesn't it.

You have finished reading the Rat Codes! How worthwhile.

You've gained 77,777 x Rat (new total 850,448).

0 change points, 1 more needed to reach level 1.

Your 'Crime Level' Quality has gone!


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Miniature Rat Egg

What? Why? How? When?

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Bee Achievement

Hivelord Beeton is your unofficial name among the Bee Clans.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

Crippling Debt 1,492,995 - Maybe you should just stop

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Crippling Debt: Maybe you should just stop

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Fanciness

Your Fancy Points. Fanciness is important in the Rat Zone, almost as important as Rats. But not quite that important.
Clothing or the occasional rare event may provide Fanciness.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.

Bee Lure

This sweet concoction can be used to attract some Rat Bees.


Rataholics Anonymous

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Need to discuss your rat issues, or maybe just find some hapless victim to dump rats onto? This is the place for that, as laid out in the Rat Codes of Practise. Please note that the name has nothing to do with Ratahol. We're not even sure Ratahol exists, and if it does it's probably illegal.

Always

Always

Locate rathavers in your area

Rathavers willing to both send and receive rats are waiting at your call.

Send a Message

Rats are the medium of communication du jour in the Rat Zone, but if you're a bit snobbish, you can send a letter the old fashioned way.
NOTE: if you don't put anything in the message box, no message will actually be sent.

Die

If you want to, I won't stop you.

Go to the Emblem Emporium

A fancy place!

You may change your avatar here

Go to the Rat Achievement Station

Where the brave and the bold can have their deeds accredited.

            1000
            You need 1,000 x Rat  (you have 304641)

            1000
            Unlocked with 1,000 x Rat  - you have 304641

The Objective Outhouse

Ask the Mystery Mystic a question, and you shall learn. The Mystic specialises mostly in Rat Zone activities. They're basically a ratty travel agent.

Rat Challenge!

Want to prove your rats are more magnificent and incredible than another person's rats? Prove it, with a rat challenge! The odds are extremely fair. If you have the better rats. If you don't, it's probably highly unfair. Such is life etc etc.

            100
            You need 100 x Rat  (you have 304641)

            10
            You need Rat Points 10 (you have 2575)

            100
            Unlocked with 100 x Rat  - you have 304641

            10
            Unlocked with Rat Points 10 - you have 2575

Minor Fancy-Off

Challenge someone else to a Fancy Off! Win or lose 100 Rat Points!

            1
            You need Fanciness 1

            100
            You need Rat Points 100 (you have 2575)

            1
            Unlocked with Fanciness 1

            100
            Unlocked with Rat Points 100 - you have 2575

Major Fancy-Off

Challenge someone else to a Fanciness Contest! Stake 1000 Rat Points on your relative fanciness!

            1
            You need Fanciness 1

            1000
            You need Rat Points 1,000 (you have 2575)

            1
            Unlocked with Fanciness 1

            1000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 1,000 - you have 2575

Go to Boutiqué de Rat

The nexus of high Rat Fashion!

            5000
            You need Rat Points 5,000 (you have 2575)

            5000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 5,000 - you have 2575

Cook some things!

Don a Chef Hat and deal in the dark matter of Horrendous Brews.

            1
            You need Chef Powers 1

            1
            Unlocked with Chef Powers 1


Time to leave

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

You've served your sentence. It's time to go.

Always

Always

Out into the air of Rat Zone again

Time to leave

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

It's clammy and smells faintly of rats at all times. But it's home.


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Always

Always


Home

Out into the air of Rat Zone again

Time to leave

The Jail Zone

where crime goes to die

One of the jailers claps his hand on your shoulder, and you are teleported straight to wherever you were prior to your arrest. It's good to be home!

You return to the Rat Zone. It's good to be home!

You moved to a new setting: The Rat Zone.


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Miniature Rat Egg

What? Why? How? When?

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Bee Achievement

Hivelord Beeton is your unofficial name among the Bee Clans.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Fanciness

Your Fancy Points. Fanciness is important in the Rat Zone, almost as important as Rats. But not quite that important.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.

Bee Lure

This sweet concoction can be used to attract some Rat Bees.


Rat storm!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Distressingly common recently. Bloops (forgive the technical jargon) in the fabric of reality can occasionally cause a melding of our world and the strange, vaguely purple-tinted Rat Storage Zone. Someone owned those rats, but now they're technically finder's keepers. Just try not to get concussed.

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Scavenging

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: pretty good odds.

No time like the present! Get out there in the middle of the ratrain and try and nab yourself some mailing fuel.

Take cover!

There'll be plenty of time after the space-time continuum settles itself to scavenge. No need to take unnecessary risks.


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 850448

Rat Prizes Lounge!

Unlocked with Rat Points 1 - you have 4850

Rat Tournament!

Unlocked with Tournament Standing 1 - you have 2

Always

Always


A good haul!

Scavenging

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: pretty good odds.

You collect a reasonably large haul from the torrential downpour, and manage to avoid getting knocked out to boot! Great job!

You were fortunate!

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

You've gained 43,386 x Rat (new total 348,027).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Free rat!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Hooray!

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

It's a free rat!

Hooray!

For free!

No!

Free rat!

Hooray!

I don't want a free rat! I won't fall for your guile and tricksy ways!


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Sending Rats!

Unlocked with 1 x Rat  - you have 348027

Always

Always


Well, alright.

No!

Free rat!

Hooray!

Congratulations! You resisted the temptation of a rat.
No, you're not getting a prize. Why, did you want Rat Points for refusing a rat?


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Miniature Rat Egg

What? Why? How? When?

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Bee Achievement

Hivelord Beeton is your unofficial name among the Bee Clans.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Fanciness

Your Fancy Points. Fanciness is important in the Rat Zone, almost as important as Rats. But not quite that important.
Clothing or the occasional rare event may provide Fanciness.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.

Bee Lure

This sweet concoction can be used to attract some Rat Bees.


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Always

Always


Rat Prizes Lounge!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.

This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not

Always

Always

One Hundred Rats

Seventy five Rat Points will buy you 100 rats. Alright exchange rat(e).

            75
            You need Rat Points 75 (you have 2575)

            75
            Unlocked with Rat Points 75 - you have 2575

One Thousand Rats

500 Rat Points will buy you 1000 Rats. Better exchange rate!

            500
            You need Rat Points 500 (you have 2575)

            500
            Unlocked with Rat Points 500 - you have 2575

Five thousand rats

2000 Rat Points will buy you 5000 Rats. Even better exchange rate!

            2000
            You need Rat Points 2,000 (you have 2575)

            2000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 2,000 - you have 2575

Twenty thousand rats!

6000 Rat Points will get you 20000 Rats. Best exchange rate? Not quite.

            6000
            You need Rat Points 6,000 (you have 2575)

            6000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 6,000 - you have 2575

One Hundred Thousand Rats

A whopping 32000 rat points will net you this princely (But not Rat-Kingly) sum of 100000 rats. Best exchange rate? Yes, definitely.

            32000
            You need Rat Points 32,000 (you have 2575)

            32000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 32,000 - you have 2575

Ticket to Well

No luck finding wells in the Rat Acquisition Deck? Ratco does not encourage well liason, but if you're willing to spend the Rat Points you can get yourself a guaranteed meeting with a well.

            7777
            You need Rat Points 7,777 (you have 2575)

            7777
            Unlocked with Rat Points 7,777 - you have 2575

Buy a Brew

Need a Horrendous Brew? For some horrendous disgusting reason? The vending machine offers a "delicious nutrient solution", but it's not very nutritious or delicious and is actually rather horrendous.

However, because head management at Ratco believe the solution to be the most delicious thing ever made, the price is quite high. Still, if you can't find any other means of obtaining a brew, this one works.

            15000
            You need 15,000 x Rat  (you have 348027)

            5000
            You need Rat Points 5,000 (you have 2575)

            15000
            Unlocked with 15,000 x Rat  - you have 348027

            5000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 5,000 - you have 2575


Rat storm!

Distressingly common recently. Bloops (forgive the technical jargon) in the fabric of reality can occasionally cause a melding of our world and the strange, vaguely purple-tinted Rat Storage Zone. Someone owned those rats, but now they're technically finder's keepers. Just try not to get concussed.

Rat Acquisitions

Perform various deeds: get Rats

Scavenging

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: pretty good odds.

No time like the present! Get out there in the middle of the ratrain and try and nab yourself some mailing fuel.

Take cover!

There'll be plenty of time after the space-time continuum settles itself to scavenge. No need to take unnecessary risks.


Prizes!!!

Rat Prizes Lounge!

It's not really much of a lounge, if we're being honest. More of a run-down shack, held up mostly by the sheer volume of corpses it contains. Thankfully, the Rat Zone is perfectly sanitary and the Lounge is entirely free of the hazards and undesirable qualities one would normally associate with a room filled with corpses. A vending machine sits behind a counter in the manner of a shop assistant. Please choose your desired purchase. Currency's Rat Points, of course.
<p>[This storylet will loop repeatedly until you choose to exit it via Perhaps Not]</p>

Five thousand rats

            2000
            You need Rat Points 2,000 (you have 575)

            2000
            Unlocked with Rat Points 2,000 - you have 575

The machine clicks, and then explodes into a flurry of rats. Fortunately, a replacement vending machine takes its place, so you can still trade here. And you have your rats, slightly charred due to vending machine related combustion though they may be.

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

You've gained 5,000 x Rat (new total 353,027).

You've lost 2,000 x Rat Points (new total 575).


Headwear

Hats, masks and other such cranial toppings.

Jewellery

Shiny things! Gotta love 'em.

Jorts

Comfortable and hard wearing. The fashion item of choice in Rat Zone.

Rodent Slot

Vague approximations of a rodent.

Rat Bee

Some horrendous genetic abberation which does not deserve life. Perhaps you can sell it.

Cyberat

The rat.... of the Future.

Rat

This is a common or garden Rat! It is dead. Perfectly sanitary though, I assure you. Well, maybe not perfectly. Mostly.

General Clutter

Miscellany and assorted gubbins.

Magic Rat Ball

A dark glass orb with a tiny rat floating inside. Shake the ball to learn a Rat Fact!

2k15 Rock

A shattered shard of the Sellout Shack, reminding us of what was once and what will not be again.

Seeking a Certain Tally of Rats

Are you entirely certain you know what you're getting into here?

Crippling Debt

How many rats have you lost to one thing or another?

Rat Fact

A nugget of wisdom about the venerable Rat.

Rat Facts II

Other facts, about other rats.

Emblem

The pictorial insignia with which you identify most strongly.

Crime Level

Ratco have heard rumours of increased Crime activity in the Rat Zone, and have deployed Crime Squads to stop it! Be wary of crime. Don't let it get to 5!

Rat Points

The cosmic karmic reward for sending a rat or several. Can be redeemed for things in the Rat Prizes Lounge, and elsewhere.

Reading the Rat Codes

A fascinating account of the mind of a lunatic.

Tournament Standing

What's your standing in the First Official Glorious Rat Tournament?

Horrendous Brew

God, it stinks. It looks like the most awful thing you can imagine, if said awful thing was put through a blender and then fried in oil high in saturated fat.


A good haul!

Scavenging

Luck

Watch for the fall of a card.

A matter of luck: pretty good odds.

Rat storm!

The Rat Zone

Rat sending simulator 2k13 starting area

Distressingly common recently. Bloops (forgive the technical jargon) in the fabric of reality can occasionally cause a melding of our world and the strange, vaguely purple-tinted Rat Storage Zone. Someone owned those rats, but now they're technically finder's keepers. Just try not to get concussed.

No time like the present! Get out there in the middle of the ratrain and try and nab yourself some mailing fuel.

You collect a reasonably large haul from the torrential downpour, and manage to avoid getting knocked out to boot! Great job!

You were fortunate!

You've gained 37,488 x Rat (new total 887,936).